When You’ve Just Got To Paint It Right Stinking Now

August 10, 2009

There’s a little saying that goes through my head every time I see woodwork that is extremely unattractive.  I don’t know where I picked it up.  Was it during those embarrassing days as a teenage cheerleader?  Is it from a movie? The little ditty goes something like this:

“U.G.L.Y. You ain’t got no alibi, you ugly, yeah yeah, you ugly.”

Sometimes you own see a piece of furniture, and at that moment it strikes you.  You simply must grab some paint and transform the piece that very instant.  When I feel the need, the need for speed, I turn to my trusty spray paint. 

I had this extremely unattractive “cherry” bench that I bought online years ago.  Real cherry wood is darker and richer.  But in my case, it was one of those moments of desperation when you 1) pretend the online photos aren’t all that bad and 2) need something right now and you don’t think the ugliness factor all the way through.

Exhibit A:

bench before

I am not a wicker person, and I typically steer clear of reddish cherry wood tones.  So what prompted me years ago to throw good money at something so faux?  A question Mr. CG has asked several times – I usually just change the subject.  But not today.  Today, I faced my ugly reddish wicker basketed bench* head on. 

*My sincerest apologies to anyone who owns said “ugly reddish wicker basketed bench”.

What is that color anyway? 

Must. Address. Problem. Now.

Step One:  Sand edges.

Step Two: Spray primer.


Step Three:  Miracle worker ‘Heirloom White’.

heirloom white

Step Four:  I located the plain Jane cushion that came with this bench in the depths of my linen closet, and with a bit of brown floral fabric, stitched up a quick little slipcover with my sewing machine with the same technique I used for these cushions.

I considered painting one of the wicker baskets for the center, but the bottom was prickly in parts and I risked scratching my paint job.  Some canvas bins might work here, or a higher quality softer bottomed basket.

Step Five:  Reattach brushed nickel knobs.  Reuse wicker baskets elsewhere.  Stack a few books.  Add a cozy blanket.  Voila !  Now I have myself a more Pottery Barnish (not a word) bench. 

pottery barnish

Once again, the ‘Before’ and ‘After’:

b and a bench 

After I completed painting this bench, I posted some words in a discussion about the pros and cons of spray paint.  It’s true, and I can’t deny it.  The smooth and uniform finish of perfectly applied spray paint on wood makes my heart go pitter patter. 

spray paint finish

Now this bench is perfect for extra seating at this pedestal table, lounging, reading a book, or enjoying a quick bite. 

bench under table

What about you?  Have you ever been stricken with the affliction to paint something immediately and without hesitation ? 

Tags: , , , , ,

72 Responses to “When You’ve Just Got To Paint It Right Stinking Now”

Leave a Reply